Many factors play into our sensual vitality as women. How to tap into our natural flow of succulence as modern-day, busy goddesses is an inquiry of endless fascination to me. Here’s a fundamental key I’ve discovered: the more we create a life that allows us space to honor our unique rhythm, the more effortlessly turned-on we will be.

Everybody is different of course but in general, I believe when a woman has space in her life to move according to her own intuitive flow, she naturally feels more resourced and relaxed. And that makes for a sexy woman.

So if we’re wanting more sensuality and joy in our lives, we would do well to focus less on fixing or figuring it out (activating our masculine and mental energy) and surrender more to feeling our way through the heart and body, remembering what is already and essentially in us.

Our female bodies are designed to be vessels of sensuality, love and pleasure. This light is our greatest gift to the world. In this historical moment on the planet, we have an incredibly potent opportunity/imperative as women to reclaim this feminine radiance and merge it with our well-honed masculine energy.

The queen is taking back her rightful place on the throne, alongside the king, in our own bodies, relationships and the world.

You may feel that you’ve been in hypermasculine overdrive for so long that you don’t know your authentic feminine rhythm any more. You may be doing your best to carve out space for self-care but, if you get honest with yourself, it’s usually far less than you really need or long for.

Instead, there seems to be a constant pressure to push yourself harder. You might feel that you can’t slow down, can’t afford to, too much to do, so many others depending on you. Easy to get hooked by all the “logic” and “evidence” to support this culturally dominant win-lose view. Everywhere we look we encounter the hyper-masculine drive to accomplish more, go faster, schedule more of our time, save a world that seems to be spinning out of control.

Of course we want to give to others, contribute our goodness to the planet, make a difference and create a life of abundance. It’s just that we’ve got to do that in ways that honor the feminine in us more sustainably and effectively. We can begin by unhooking, moment by moment, from the ways we’ve become accustomed to sourcing our energy: from fear, lack, adrenalin, competition, ambition, consumption. Let us remember that addiction to these sources puts power in the hands of those determined to keep us hungry for more, asleep, isolated, and spending.

Reclaiming our natural feminine essence and Shakti, gives us access to the abundant resources of energy, vitality and magnetism within. The chalice fills and there’s overflow to share with the thirsty world. And we love to do that. Because it’s natural to give our love and light when we are full and have enough.

You already know love is the answer and it starts with loving you. Loving yourself means listening to your body and her need for rest, support, nourishment and connection. Creating unstructured time to dance with the mystery of life, to allow grace to kiss your brow and reveal your next step.

It has taken me decades to create a life that deeply nourishes my feminine in commitment to spaciousness, sovereignty, sacredness and contribution. It looks quite different in my empty-nested 50’s than it did in my super mom 30’s. Wherever you are in your life cycle, in your quest for right livelihood, in your process of falling deeply and passionately in love with yourself exactly the way that you are, take heart sister. It can and will get easier and easier. You can let go, even tentatively at first, and all really will be well.

I remember many years ago thinking that I’d get fired, that I’d never be able to make ends meet, when I first asked to shift to a four-day work week so I could have a little more space to listen to my heart and soul. I was a stressed out workaholic, in debt, exhausted and had no interest in sex. It was the beginning of crafting a life that worked for me and listening to my own rhythm. It was the beginning of awakening my Shakti, loving myself enough to trust my desire and finding the courage to lean towards it. It was the beginning of realizing that there was nothing wrong with my sex drive, my yoni or my lack of turn-on. The more I took steps in alignment with my feminine soul, the more naturally my body blossomed open in her succulence, sensuality and joy.

Keep taking those steps. 

Let this beautiful full moon in the sky be your teacher (whether you’re still bleeding or not). There are times when you are huge, bright and totally “on.” Doesn’t it feel amazing to give from your bigness? Ahhh! Then there are times when you can’t tell whether you’re waxing or waning so you make room for uncertainty. When in shadow time, let go into the fertile darkness, letting your tears of grief or the spittle of your rage water the soil in preparation for the inevitable cycle of birth that follows death.

Thank you for all you do in your life and the ways you honor the feminine. It makes a difference. I feel so honored to be in this circle and in this conversation with you.

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